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Understanding the Learning Differences of Adopted Children
It's a tribute to adoptive families that studies of adopted children's IQ's correlate with their adoptive siblings and parents, but it's not always easy figuring out a child's differences, so some parents have had to work harder at cracking the code of a child's school challenges.
Different Learning Styles
There are many inherited differences in learning and memory, and this is perhaps the most common difficulty that many adoptive parents face. In
The Tyranny of Our Thinking Styles, read more about how difficult it is to understand how another person thinks and learns. Some of these differences - like how you remember where you're going, how you remember spelled words, or do math problems - are so non-intuitive, you have to do a little research.
Another difficult thing is that the children themselves often don't about how different they are (in their strengths as well as their challenges) - and so they get down on themselves and kick themselves for being 'stupid'.
Often we've seen a successful parent with dyslexia comfort and encourage their child with stories about how they've gone through the same thing. Adopted children might miss this, so their parents may need to work extra hard to specifically encourage, notice, and celebrate their unique gifts.
International Adoption, Special Needs
Children adopted from overseas countries, or those with early stressful or deprived lives, or well-recognized special needs, often have different wiring because of development factors, toxic exposures, and significant differences in their early life experiences. We commonly see a higher incidence of sensory processing complaints, auditory processing impairment, or visual spatial memory problems.
Children with these different issues may have dramatically different preferences and efficiencies in how they learn and remember (and what they find confusing), so having an individualized understanding of their biology can be a powerful guide when making choices about education setting or intervention.
IQ tests may be particularly unreliable for these kids, and parents may know test results underestimate intelligence, but parents can make a tremendous difference if they can learn as much as they can about their child's unique needs.
Learn as much as you can by reading at our blog or through our chapters in The Mislabeled Child. We'll be adding more links soon. The brain is remarkably changeable and resilient, and much can be achieved with strategic intervention.
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